Warts

Wanna see the latest progress on my warts?
Its pretty sick guys...but strangely entertaining to blog about.
Waddaya say?

Frosty Window Wisdom

Wednesday morning my car windows had an impressive layer of frost on them.
Its very cold and dark at 6:30 AM, almost perfectly silent, and my brain is functioning at its most basic level.
Bundled in coat and mitts, I begin to chip the frost off with my (mom's) handy-dandy scraper tool.
I begin at the driver door window, and move right to the backseat window. And so on to the rear window...and then the other passenger window...
Suddenly a figure appears next to me. Its wearing a head lamp.
"Don't worry," it says, "Only six months until you won't have to do this anymore."
The figure, who is a old man with a short gray beard, chuckles, and then walks away.

I pause.
So many questions.
Who is this person? Why have they come to me?
What is the significance of his statement?

Perhaps it was Old Man Winter.
Or maybe it was the old guy that delivers the Daily News in that truck parked across the street.

Either way I was too tired to give it much thought.
Until now.
He was really random.

Long Weekend Shopping Trip

Last Tuesday some friends and I piled into 2 cars and roadtripped out to Kelowna for the day! We did the mandatory stop at Orchard Park Mall, LuLu Lemon, and Tim Hortons/A&W. We also stopped for a quick break at the lake to take pictures and enjoy the view.
A good time was had by all.
My favorite part may have been when Rebekah and I were walking through the mall, and a very, VERY, aggressive salesman in a booth flagged us down and shouted as us to come closer and listen.
But that's not all. He was selling.....are you ready for this?.....SHAMWOW towels!
Now...you may not have heard of SHAMWOW towels before...but my infinitely wise brother, Paul, has.
While I was ready to hear the spiel, Rebekah needed a bit more convincing, so he bribed her with a FREE SAMPLE! (which she promptly handed to me)
It was hilarious. He was very energetic and hilarious to watch...but very forceful. So basically when he turned his back I grabbed Rebekah and ran!
With the free sample of course :)
Afterwards we went to the lake and goofed off...




There.
I didn't talk about warts or scabs, or anything gross. Happy?! :P

Wart War

During my summer at Homewood I made this disturbing discovery: two warts on my right foot.
Although I was given much helpful advice on how to get rid of them, I never did get around to it, and actually became quite used to the new additions. They were quiet, unobtrusive, and minded their own business. We got along just fine.
Until recently.
I noticed the other day they had added another to their tribe. A THIRD wart has sprouted on my middle toe, sort of nestled in a hidden place between two toes.
The whole secrecy of it has me all riled up. This uninvited guest is not welcome. I was fine with two little warts, but I've come to realize they've been plotting a hostile takeover this whole time...they were just waiting for me to become complacent.
(there is a little arrow pointing to the sneaky little wart...the other two are fairly obvious)

I've turned to Compound W for help.

Yesterday I applied the first coat. It turns them all white and fizzly. I hope it works.
Its time for the Warts to MOVE OUT!!!
I'll let you know how it goes.

(That's right...I'm subjecting you to another series of posts about grossness)

Ode to the Eleventh Month

Remember, remember, the fifth of November
only twenty-five days left to go.
I see no reason
for this dull, gray, season,
caught between bright fall leaves, and snow.
Oppressing, oppressing, my spirit depressing;
drudgery, and gloom abound.
I can only have hope
I'll find some way to cope,
until December is found.

Ok, ok, I was never great at poetry. But at least you don't have to look at those awful yearbook photos anymore...

Jill: Through The Ages

I think my brothers and I went trick or treating maybe 3 times since we moved to Kamloops. After that, I never had an outlet for my weird fascination with costumes and "dressing up".
Maybe that is why I was suddenly driven to www.yearbookyourself.com tonight. I needed to have a good laugh at myself ...

I bring to you, Jill Coulter, age 20, year 2000 AD.
Those bangs are amazing. The curling iron definitely belongs to my mom though.

1998: this isn't even too bad. I always wondered what I would look like with a little bit of curl in my hair.
Stepping further back in time now, to 1996...I distinctly remember my mom looking like this when we were kids. Scary.
I could be McGyyvers girlfriend with hair like this. Its 1994, and I've just had my weekly perm done. The resting-chin-on-hand is one sexy pose. I'm also a fan of the padded jacket.

Back in 1990 I was still getting into my perm routine, so this is mostly just the work of a curling iron and hairspray.
Ahhhh....the '80s. Those were the days. Shoulder pads were THE thing, I tell ya.
I'd like to forget 1984 ever happened. Please.
Now THIS is hot stuff. Gotta love 1980.
Not sure what's going on here, guys. After all, this is 1978.
A personal favorite. I think I would have done well in the '70s. Particularly '78.

Or maybe not. '74 wasn't good for anyone though...right? RIGHT?

This is more like it! Look at that saucy grin. Look out world, its 1972!
1970: Someone please strangle me with those fake pearls.
Wowee! I had a neck in 1968!
Oh boy...OH BOY. We need to bring '66 back, guys. Who's with me?
'64...an atrocity. What the heck was going on.
The best thing about this 1960's photo is the collar.
Yup, I was definitely meant for the 50's. It doesn't get any better than this.

I think I will go weep now.